If you’ve been reading along for a while, you know that I did a chronic infections panel to find out if an underlying infection could be the root cause of my ongoing Lupus activity. It was on this day last year that I received the positive result for borellia burgdorfori (the bacteria that causes Lyme Disease) among eight other chronic infections.
It was a strange moment. When I walked into my Naturopathic appointment, my doctor had only just received the results and had not previewed them so as he read to me what tested positive, he started to slow down near the end. You know that big news is coming when someone tries to be extra sensitive with how they share it. He didn't want to say it at first, but when he said that the last positive result on the list was borellia burgdorfori, I didn’t need him to explain. I knew what it was.
“That’s the bacteria that causes Lyme Disease, right?”
My heart sank. I knew the gravity of the situation. I knew right away that this was the most complicated infection anyone could possibly have.
I took a deep breath. I was disappointed that this route was now my reality, but I was not fearful of what was to come. In fact, I had joy in my diagnosis! I know, I know, that’s a really bizarre thing to say. But it’s true. Just like when I had heart failure or when I learned that I had Lupus, I knew there was nothing to fear because my heavenly Father is sovereign over it all.
“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear, because fear has torment; and the one fearing has not been perfected in love.”
1 John 4:18
In this scripture, we learn that fear is from Satan and only brings torment to a person. If we hang back a bit into 1 John 4:8, we see that God is love; his character is true love. When we fully surrender our lives and circumstances to the will of the Father, we can experience His perfect love that casts out fear.
The only way to let go of fear and bring this fire to your soul is to experience a softened heart towards what God’s will is for you. This comes through prayer (you talking to God) and reading the bible (God talking to you).
A great starting place is daily devotions, but these can be completely out of context and written to tickle our ears. Digging into the word - uninterrupted bible study - is when truth is revealed. Your heart must be open to reproach and learning where you need to change your life. You have to be willing to look for sin you need to repent of.
I would like to note that there have been several seasons that I have needed medicine to help bring my physical body ease while my mind caught up. I could be unafraid but my body was continuing to tremor in a way that I couldn’t control. In these situations, I have found UNDA30 drops and GABA Pro tablets to be very helpful at easing anxiety so that I could think more rationally.
Other helpful approaches have been using essential oils (especially diffusing lavender) and taking a long soak in a detox bath (hot water, epsom salts, baking soda, essential oils).
Most notable for changing my mindset though has been starting each morning with an hour of prayer and bible reading before even letting the kids out of bed!
With all that being said, we need to recognize that there is a difference between worldly fear and a healthy fear of the Lord. There are numerous places in scripture where we are instructed to fear the Lord in a way that brings about repentance and a choice to live in obedience to His commandments.
“Blessed is everyone who fears the Lord, who walks in his ways.”
When we recognize the gravity of the consequences of our sin, we can choose to repent and change our hearts to live the way God calls us to. It is a good thing to fear God’s wrath and to accept His mercy and grace through the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ.
“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”
The opposite of experiencing worldly fear is a washing of peace that comes from living in light of God’s promises. You cannot be submissive to the will of God while keeping one foot in the world. Do not be afraid of what people think. There is a remnant of dedicated believers; seek them out for fellowship and encouragement. Please feel free to use the contact page to email me any time.